A Conversation!

She answered, “It would be better if you email me and don’t text me.”
He was like, “How these two actions are different!”
She answered, “I know the time you invested years back, it was priceless.”
He became a bit confused, “Then where is this thing coming from?”
She answered, “No, you know it would be really great if we do not keep in touch.”
That made no sense to him whatsoever.
She also answered, “The devotion you showed me was priceless and not repayable, tell me if you ever need any monetary help.”
He thought, “If the devotion is priceless, how much you are going to pay then!”
She again answered, “Do not think I am showing off my husband’s money or mine, it’s just it.”
She also added to that bit, “You know the money is important and will help you through.”
He shouted inside his mind, “Help through what?”
Her answer ended with a sad emoji.
His only question was, “Are you okay during the pandemic? I wouldn’t have texted if it was under control in the area you are living. I hope you are okay.”
Then her answered turned this to a mesmerising conversation.
He touched his face and covered it with his hands.
He remained as such for half an hour and only could laugh in his mind and cursed it.
A mild question turned into a most humiliating conversation ever.
A conversation he had hoped a thousand times to happen and now started regretting of it till the end.
A conversation most awaited, but most hated now.
Only he hoped and even kept hoping her to be alright.
He kept hoping not to have any conversation again ever.
The final conversation if only hoped!

After a long time!

After a long time, I felt that urge in my body to have you.
After a long time, I saw myself in the mirror to see how I look.
After a long time, a mild breeze just blew my mind and make me cringe!
After a long time, something is happening to change things for good.
After a long time, I felt the rain on my face and didn’t just hide away.
After a long time, opening my arms I hugged the air around me.
After a long time, I wanted to eat the sweetest chocolate bar in the world.
After a long time, I knew how hungry I was not to eat but to have it.
After a long time, when I stood by the side of the road, I saw the river floating towards me.
After a long time, I knew I had to be touched but not just acted out.
After a long time, I realized the mind blowing games were not that spontaneous.
After a long time, a lot of changes happened without the changes to be wanted or even wished for.
After a long time, the thoughts are coming in my filthy brain and not being written in plain.
After a long time, I came to love the only thing I had ever wished to love, myself!

Last Year!

Last year was of so many things.
Last year was of so many aspirations.
Last year was of so many disappointments.
Last year was of knowing that I lost my integrity.
Last year was of acknowledging for being a thief.
Last year was of losing hope.
Last year was of showing the groundless foundation.
Last year was of telling me that I was not enough.
Last year was of the year of enlightenment.
Last year was the year where I made myself born again.
Last year was the year of realising that I should have held hands.
Last year was the year that made me see the failure of me.
Last year was the year of watching the fall from the Mount Everest to the bottom of the sea.
Last year was not ready to walk ahead.
Last year was not putting everything behind.
Last year was not of letting go and moving forward.
Last year when it’s gone, for the lost hope I want to raise like the Phoenix!

I pay my penance!

I know that I have to pay my penance.
I have to pay for the deeds I have done.
I have to pay them quickly and with full heart.
The penance otherwise, is going to eat me alive.
The penance will not give me rest from the burning in my heart.
The penance that will take me to the end of the road, will definitely hunt me to my very last breath.
I know that I have to pay the penance as there’s no other way.
If I want to see the sky,
If I want to look at the purity of the flowers,
If I want to smell the celestial scent,
If I want to drink the water from the heaven after walking through the dead desert,
If I want to have a little bit of rest,
I do have to pay the penance for my doings.
I do have to pay my penance.

আজ হঠাৎই!

আজ হঠাৎই মনে হলো যেন আকাশের দিকে চেয়ে দেখি সেই পৃথিবীর ছায়া হয়ে ঘুরে বেড়ানো চাঁদটাকে।
আজ হঠাৎই মনে হলো সমুদ্রের নোনা জলে গা এলিয়ে শুয়ে থাকি।
আজ হঠাৎই মনে হলো ঐ দূরে মাথা উঁচু করে দাঁড়িয়ে থাকা পাহাড়টাকে আলিঙ্গনে আবদ্ধ করি।
আজ হঠাৎই মনে হলো একটা মাচা নিয়ে বায়ু সাধতে বসি।
আজ হঠাৎই মনে হলো আগুন ধরিয়ে তাতে নেয়ে পরিশুদ্ধ করে নেই এই অশুদ্ধ মনটাকে।
আজ হঠাৎই মনে হলো করি শুধু তাই যা করতে হাজারো বারণ।
আজ হঠাৎই মনে হলো নিজেকে মনে করিয়ে দেই কতটা শূন্য এই অভ্যন্তর।
আজ হঠাৎই মনে হলো দৃষ্টি মেলে শুধু এমন কিছু দেখি যা দেখতে কোন পরিশ্রম নেই।
আজ হঠাৎই মনে হলো একটা গাছের শক্ত ডালে বানাই সাজানো ঘর।
আজ হঠাৎই মনে হলো বৈশাখী ঝড়ে প্রচণ্ড আকার ধারণ করা সেই ঝড়ো হাওয়া হয়ে উড়ে যাই।
আজ হঠাৎই মনে হলো সব এলোমেলো ভাবনা গুলোকে আড়াল হতে এনে দুপুরের খরো রোদে রোদ পোহাই।
আজ হঠাৎই মনে হলো যেন আমি আমাকে নাটাই থেকে ছাড়া পাওয়া ঘুরি ভাবি।
আজ হঠাৎই মনে হলো।